The Powerful Question at the Root of a Generative Family

Do you know that the most harmonious and generative families on Earth have 10 habits in common? What if I tell you that these families, in order to get there, just had to answer a single question?! A question whose answer becomes a flashlight to illuminate this wonderful and simultaneously challenging journey of parenting.

The Power of the Heart

In NLP and Generative Parenting, we believe in the power of the heart to see the essence, to accept and respect, in freedom. The same heart that knows the way to deconstruct our beliefs and, in turn, generates new behaviors, creating a positive impact on the world around us, which has repercussions throughout the planet. The latest scientific studies show that when we live from the heart, when we connect with ourselves and with our neighbors in this way, we are changing our field, and that when many of us (i.e. many fields) come together with a common intention, magic happens and the Earth's magnetic field is also changed.

“Our heart is the most powerful biomagnetic generator we have in our body and it is directly linked to the Earth’s magnetic field!” ~ Gregg Braden ~

We are not the victims of what happens to us, we are the victims of our beliefs, of how we react, instead of acting in the face of adversity. We are often the victims of a painful childhood, still not healed, and we tend to (unconsciously) project this pain on our children. We are the only living species on top of the Earth that has the capacity for self-healing. To consciously choose, here and now, to assign another meaning to an event, for example. And we do it not because the environment around us is hostile, but because we choose to do so. The purpose of this new way of parenting is to welcome, integrate and transcend any and all challenges. We are all born creators, we were “made in the image and likeness of God” (a metaphor that crosses all religions).

When you feel you are stuck in a limiting belief, act instead of being indifferent. With a magnifying glass in hand, without making judgements and with curiosity, you can try asking yourself:

  • Does this belief serve me?

  • Who does my belief best serve?

  • Does it make sense to me?

  • Do I really want to believe in this?

“Indifference is a paralysis of the heart.” ~ Saint Augustine ~

From Chaos to Harmony

The world education system is obsolete. We are living in a period of chaos and we must welcome it, rather than fighting it. Only then can something totally new emerge, something powerful and better, a new order. Globally speaking, children's mental health has never been so bad. Children’s and parents’ mental health, of course. Behavior generates behavior. When a family chooses love, they are an example of that for an entire community, and we also know that the world moves forward only with the help of communities that apply conscious daily practices. This is how you move forward nowadays. We live in a world of infinite possibilities, so we must unlearn to create space for new learning to occur.

How? With unconditional love, which has no expectations, no dependence, no possession, no awards, rewards or punishments, a love that is free of illusions, without control, with the quality of our presence, which allows us to identify the energy of emotions that arise, what I am bringing to the present moment, always with curiosity, generosity and compassion (for ourselves and for the other), with great flexibility and acceptance, with confidence in ourselves and in our children, by listening, being authentic and consistent, observing, without judgment. We can only raise a child after we have (re)educated ourselves. We can only connect with a child once we have connected with ourselves. As a mother, as a father, you are not here to raise a child, but to accompany them on their journey and to grow up with them. They come complete and don’t need to be fixed.

What You Do to One, You Do to Everyone

What can happen if you educate for a more sustainable and just world, of equal value, where inclusion and human rights sit at the same table? If your family starts eating more organic products (if you do not do it already), eating less meat (if you still eat), less sugar and processed foods. You can choose to buy products from fair trade, local commerce, trade your car for a bike, go for family walks, especially those that put you in touch with nature, help with reforestation, volunteer, eliminate the consumption of products that imply devastation of the Amazon, rainforests, exploitation of slave or child labor…

Believe me, every gesture you take, however small they may seem to you, has implications for the whole, we are all interconnected. As Rumi told us, “I am not a drop in the ocean, but an entire ocean in a drop.”

The Light Hidden in the Question

Because I believe that the path of parenting makes us more whole, that the parent – children relationship is the most generative and spiritual of all relationships we can ever experience, the proposal of NLP & Generative Parenting also lies in the power of intention, in addition to the power of the heart.

What can happen, here and now, if you consciously question yourself:

  • “What is my intention as a mother/father?”

It’s not about perfection, it’s about connection.

Find Out More About this Topic at the NLP International Conference

Learn more about Generative Parenting and do consider joining Rita's session at the 2021 Virtual NLP International Conference in May 2021.